remembering the sisterhood.
. “Cut those nails — you look like a witch!” “That red lipstick makes your lips look lovely but it’s a bit slutty, don’t you think?” “It’s lovely to see you dressing for yourself but that dress is a little too short for appropriate.” “She is basically asking for it.” “You are such a beautiful woman; Don’t cover your face up in all that make up. But maybe just touch-up that acne, define those eyes a bit but go for a a more “natural” look.” “You should defiantly dye your hair. Of course it’s beautiful naturally; It’s just a little dull.” “What about some natural highlights?” “The models get away with it. Not us!” “How do you put up with being so short?” “How do you wear those heels!?” “She’s that type of girl that has something to say about everything.” “Defiantly stay in shape. But don’t get too muscular though... You’ll look like a man!” “Be healthy.” “Eat good food.” “Don’t be so restrictive!” Don’t eat your emotions! “You are looking.... thin. Eat up.” “You are looking... healthy. You seem to be enjoying life (too much)!” “I love your hair long — It’s nice and feminine, that way.” “I love that you are having fun and “letting your hair down” But don’t get too wild. — You are still a mother.” “By the way, your body looks amazing for having 3 kids! You’d never know!” “She’s heaps of fun. But, She’s a flirt.” “She’s too attractive.” “She’s just privileged.” “She’s not worked hard enough — to deserve the right.” “She needs to prove herself.” “She’s actually too nice. I don’t trust her.” “I think you should show your body off more. You deserve the attention!” “She needs to get out of those frumpy clothes.” “Mutton dressed as lamb...” “You’re not leaving ANYTHING to the imagination, in that!” “Are you hiding away?” “Wow. She’s so attention seeking!” “She asks for A LOT. She’s such high maintenance.” “She doesn’t say enough and people walk all over Her.” “She’s demanding. He must be whipped.” “She’s too much.” A woman that is: confident secure expressive forthright experimental beautiful comfortable smart honest opinionated sexual fun experienced stubborn loud emotional CANNOT BE LIBERATED within a sisterhood — dominated by discriminatory gas lighting, deep dehumanizing wounds — growing through the historic evolution of The Female; The dulling result of patriarchal conditioning and the accepted conversation that rides on the back of intimidation, rooting from the expectation OF WHAT A WOMAN SHOULD BE — highlighting her flaws, the attempting to suppress and diminish Her shine and the continued feeding into a cycle of egotism and envy. . Because SHE should not know herself, no. — That is arrogant and obnoxious to even suggest. . SHE should be respectful and keep others feeling COMFORTABLE. . SHE SHOULD STAY suppressed quiet subtle soft sexualised but not sexual confident but not overwhelming. . SHE SHOULD be a good girl. . SHE SHOULD listen and do — things that would never be tolerated — by a man. . When She down grades Her — She downgrades HERself. . And so — the cycle spirals. . All of the damaged baggage — that comes in association with an EMPOWERED WOMAN is just a list, written in a brainwashed state onto a label — and posted onto Her like a collage of post-it notes again and again and again . so to paralyse her into remembering HER PLACE. . I write my own damn post-it notes — Written in bloody fingertip. . And mine are bigger than yours. . They say HATERS GONNA HATE. WOMEN NEED TO TAKE MORE SPACE — AND STOP ACCEPTING LESS from themselves and from one another. . Be like a wolf, Woman. . And rip through anything that does not honour — your pack or yourself. . . . Written by Nerissa Goff (@womban_kind) for us — on the every evolving REMEMBERING of what it truly means to be — a sister.