A letter to my younger self | Orion Sun

sometimes you can feel your bones growing sometimes the pain comes in waves manageable if you don’t fight it. there are things you won’t be able to change but there are some things that you can change like how you talk to yourself and how you love yourself I forget how to do that a lot could you remind me? I don’t remember being you outside of pictures that well What comes to mind is how it felt to lay in the grass and stare up at the sky you wanted to be so many things I hope you are happy with who we have become i make music now I get to sing for beautiful people I write about where I’ve been and where I want to go I write about you sometimes only because you saved my life you kept going thank you for your persistence there are gray clouds in my brain but its not all bad it helps me see the world not so black and white like you used to things are more complicated for example, God is still capable of loving someone who doesn’t follow the rules exactly. we still like to run it still feels like the closest thing to flying I don’t run from my anxieties anymore I face them with bloody hands and bloodshot eyes I confront them and its worth it. I think of you almost everyday. I know you’d like to hear that I finally got the chance to see the world Paris being one of my favorites. I also found love the kind that makes your heart feel baptized in the purest of water it has made me new everything you dreamed it’d be I was really nervous to write to you I had a feeling that whatever I had to say wouldn’t be of value to you I only say that because sometimes life felt better back then like you were way happier consistently than I am now but nostalgia can be such a beautiful lie so warm it would be devastating to see it any other way besides true. anyways, I feel like I’m finally on the right track we’ve lost a lot of things but don’t think I didn’t learn from it. growing and constantly leaning towards the sun I had the weirdest dream last night I think it helped me write this you were talking to me from your crib you were scared to let me hold you but you did life tried to take so much from us but our trust in our self can’t be moved thank you for trusting and believing in me to get us here couldn’t have done it without you I love you.