After coming out almost three years ago to my friends and family discovering my sexual identity has been one hell of a rollercoaster ride.

Although the majority of people I’ve come out to have been nothing but accepting most of them don’t grasp the concept of bisexuality. My friends once asked me if I had a preference and I replied with: Yes, girls.

And part of me wishes I never answered.

Because after I said those two words in almost everyone’s mind I wasn’t bisexual anymore I was gay. And of course there’s no problem with being gay, but I’m not. I like girls and guys, but it appears most can’t comprehend that.

Last year I was watching the Kissing Booth and gushing over Jacob Elordi, who plays Noah, and I walked into the kitchen to grab a snack my brother was sitting down and asked me how the film was I said “it’s pretty good, one of the characters, Noah, is soooo good looking.” My brother merely responded with “but you like girls?”. Just because I generally prefer women my brother couldn’t understand what I was saying. I knew my friend had also watched the film so I called her afterwards to discuss and as I remarked for the 2nd time about how attractive Noah was she said “but you’re bi?” … “yeah, I know” I replied. It’s like everyone’s changed the definition of bisexual in their head.

And this isn’t just an issue I deal with, it’s a frequent problem encountered by bisexuals. Depending on what sex you’re dating at the time most people will re-label you as straight or gay, some lesbians don’t want to be with bisexual women because they’re not ‘pure’. Bisexuality is: when you are attracted to both sexes. Bisexuality is not: wanting threesomes all the time, a stepping stone to being gay, a label that changes based on your preference, a label that changes based on who you are dating or any other incorrect stereotype.

Now I’m not saying my friends and family are doing this on purpose, they simply need to be educated. Which is why there needs to be more information and education on LGBTQ+ identities so this issue is eliminated because being LGBTQ+ can be hard enough.