To my Remsta..
I’m writing this a couple days after I am back from tour. The tour has hands down been the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Not because of the travelling or the work load. None of that has ever been a struggle for me. In fact all that stuff is a doddle compared to the jobs I have had before this. It’s been hard because I have had to leave you. Not being there to put you to bed each night and get up in the mornings with you is something I will always struggle with. I say to every single person I meet when they ask about you how truly blessed and fortunate me and your mum are to have you in our lives. You have never ever been any bother and you have always been the most relaxed and loving child. You light up every single persons life you enter. A few people have said to me over the last month ‘it must be nice to spend a bit of time away from home though’. And I think to myself ‘right, your either not a parent, or your a pony one’. ‘Either way, your a knobhead’ (can you swear in a letter to your daughter?) Don’t get me wrong, me, your mum and the boys and all that lot still love a night out and the odd trip away.. But why would I want to be away from home for this long unless I had to be?
Being in this industry with a young child was never going to be an easy task. And me and your mum knew times like this tour were gonna be a bit of a struggle for everyone (and to be fair to your mum Rem, she has absolutely smashed it) but knowing that all of this hard work is for you, makes the work itself a lot easier. Coming home from a studio session or rehearsal and instantly being involved in a game of hide and seek or having to be some random Disney character, is something I will never get bored of doing and something I will always look forward to coming home too.
Having a good work ethic and being able to work tirelessly to do something I love to support the people I love is something I am proud of myself for being able to do. I hope when you are old enough to understand exactly why I am not home every night that what I am doing makes you proud too. I hope you can look at me as a role model and see that all the hard work and graft we put in is all for you and the family. When I wake up everyday my goal is to make you proud! You have changed my life in ways I will never be able to describe to you. You have made me feel a type of love that I didn’t even know was possible and have given me a perspective on life that I will be forever grateful for.
I’ve just put you to bed and told you two made up stories with all your favourite characters in. Your mum has just made me a lovely dinner and now I’m about to head out for a game of 5 aside, while she has a bath. Things haven’t always been easy in this house and we have had to go through some tough times like all families do. But no matter what we have always stuck together and got through it. The love we have in our home is undeniable. And that’s all because of you.
I Love you Remsta